"Not My Problem"

I have a job on-campus at King's, as a bookstore assistant. So, I am working extra hours the next two weeks as the textbook rush takes place.

At the same time, my vocal instructor is trying to set up lesson times for the year. She gives two lessons a week, on Tuesdays and Thursdays (only), from 11:30-3:30 (only). And my schedule on those days was booked so tight that I could only do lessons between 1 and 2-'o-clock. Unfortunately, today (Thursday) I was scheduled to work from 9:30 till 2.

Quite a dilemma - my boss needed her employee and my instructor needed her student at the same time. I couldn't find anyone to cover the shift and there were no additional lesson times that my instructor could provide.

I was just at the point of getting incredibly stressed out over being torn between two people whom I need to please, when I had an epiphany: this isn't my problem. It isn't my fault that my boss scheduled me to work through a class. It isn't my fault that my instructor has such a tight schedule. So, after I had exhausted all my own resources, I suggested my instructor telephone my boss. She acquiesced.

I was preparing to go to work this morning when I got a telephone call - my instructor. She said she had essentially forced my boss to give me the extra hour off, and though my boss was not very happy with her, she had finally given in. Her parting advice to me was to "be extra nice" for my boss.

5 minutes later, I walked into work and was informed by my boss that my instructor "was unwilling to change"  and that I could have the hour off. (Though she wondered aloud how my instructor's schedule could be so inflexible on the second day of classes). She was good enough not to take it out on me, but her smile belied her frustration with the turn of events.

The end results:

1. I was able to attend my voice lesson (making my instructor happy)
2. I worked for as long as I could (making my boss happy)
3. My boss became frustrated with my instructor (and vice-versa). This is as it should be. Again, the scheduling difficulties were not my own. So by letting them fight it out amongst themselves, the frustration really remained where it should always have been - between the two of them. 

This is something I have learned over the last few years at university. It is easy to automatically accept responsibility for scheduling conflicts which were created by two professors (or a professor and an employer) imposing two mutually exclusive time constraints. It actually took a great amount of courage (for me, at least) to even suggest to my instructor that she should talk to my employer directly, because that seemed like it was passing off my responsibility to someone else. 

But really, when I thought about it, the inverse was true: after doing everything I could on my own, I was giving her back responsibility that was now hers. It is very freeing thing to be able to say, with confidence, "that is not my problem." I'm not very good at it, but I am getting better.

I believe it is God's earnest desire that we seek to please Him alone. I did my best in this situation to give due respect to the authority of my instructor and my employer both, in a way that would please God. But when I could not please them both, I let them sort it out. It is not important that they like each other; but it is important that I do my utmost to please them both. In this case, paradoxically, that required me to stop doing things on my own and request that someone else do it for me. 

It doesn't feel like it, but I suppose that that was humility. Perhaps this was even a parable for salvation itself - to be saved of your sin is ultimately to transfer responsibility for your sin to Christ, and take on His righteousness. To try to do it yourself may feel noble, but that approach is ultimately firmly rooted in pride. So too, I suppose, is stress. So when I'm stressed, what I ultimately need is to be saved from my pride. 

In moments of stress, may the Lord have mercy on your soul and mine. 

Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, fear Him who destroy both soul and body in hell. (Matthew 10:28)

Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. (Matthew 6:33)